Little Bus Tayo вЂ“ The perpetually f**king useless Tayo has a stupid song to match his stupid face.

Peppa PigВ вЂ“ It's true your child has a British accent even though you live in Timaru because you're a bad parent.

The desperately inane 'Team Work What's Gonna Work? Team Work' anthem is surely the worst song to ever exist in the realm of children's TV tunes. Wonder PetsВ вЂ“ I'm a vegetarian but the songs on Wonder PetsВ make me want to eat duck just to shut that lisping bastard up. It seems like a good idea at the time, but then you're hooked and you can't stop twitching. When I asked for parents to tell me their worst songs Paw PatrolВ was a recurring feature/nightmare. Paw PatrolВ вЂ“ Just for sheer amount of times I have to hear this song screamed throughout my house and played on my TV it will share a crown for Worst Song with PJ Masks. Just don't start them and then your children might not know they exist. Yes, some people will tell you to avoid Paw Patrol because it's the children's equivalent of a men's rights podcast in terms of gender messaging вЂ“ but also, avoid it for the song. If I can save one parent from this unending orchestral nightmare it will be worth my pain and suffering.ДЄvoid these television shows AT ALL COSTS. So I write this in the hopes that you will do better at parenting than I. I am woken every morning at 5am with 'PAW TROLL PAY TROLL BE NEAR ONNA DUBBBA!' screamed into my ear at a decibel so high I am convinced it will be bleeding as I struggle toward the shower where I can only temporarily escape 'PAW TROLL PAW TROLL PAW TROLL'. No amount of Lorazepam or cough medicine skulled straight from the bottle can stop BUB BUB BUBBY BUBBY F**KING GUPPIES from screaming in my head. I wake in the night and I hear these songs and I can't escape them. Now my kids watch television in moderation, meaning: I only allow them to watch television 16 hours or so a day.ДЄs such, the theme tunes for their favourite hellish television shows are burned into my brain like acid. When I had my first baby we didn't have a television because we didn't want to expose our precious child to dreaded televisions.

Kid tv theme songs